The New Year (aka This Really Sucks).

If you join a gym that is closed for more than 2 consecutive days, reconsider your choice. Mine closed from Saturday the 23rd through to the 26th, then had skeleton staff on for the next few days, then closed again from Saturday the 29th right through to Wednesday the 3rd. So I booked a workout yesterday & went for my usual Friday routine. Holy moly crapoly – what a mistake that was. I’m right back to square one! My legs have the range of motion of Peg Bundy in a tight skirt & spikes. Honest, I actually wince (NOT mince) when I walk. Please just shoot me! Then today was “Upper Body” (said with the deep basso of James Earl Jones in a long deep well). I had a nice breakfast two hours before. Well I made it to minute 22 before my stomach said “Just what in hell do you think you’re doing? I’m trying to digest down here. Now you’ve gone & messed it all up with your damned exercises. So here – have it back. I can’t work like this.” Fortunately my Peg Bundy legs were able to move quickly to the change rooms where the pressure was alleviated. Enough for this week. Bless weekends – but I suppose I should workout some away from the gym so I can at least put in a reasonable performance next week. I made a business offer to the girl at the front desk. For a small ‘cleanup fee’ & of course the price of the bullet & a profit margin, she could just shoot us at the end of our workout. She said “well what’s in it for you?” I said “I would have the privilege of being your first customer, and I know you could get rich off this. I don’t know how your boss will take to you knocking off his clients, but hey, it’s all about customer satisfaction.” Happy 2013 everyone.

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