A Progress Report & The Mantracker

Well now I’m five months into this get fit business & I am definitely feeling better about it. Not during the exercise of course, nor for an hour or two after, but definitely before and after. I actually now look forward to going to the gym, and not just for the pretty girls. I just have to get Rich back to school – he can’t count worth a damn. I know he counts in fives, so on the last five he’ll count down 5, 4, 3, 2, and, one, more (see how he gets one more in there?). Sneaky bugger. I’ve been calling him on it. If my arms weren’t so freakin’ tired I would fire a water bottle at his head. I think I am going to add a codicil to my next contract renewal. Once every couple of weeks the client should be allowed to fire a water bottle at the trainer. If it’s a plastic or aluminum bottle it can be full, but if it’s a stainless steel one it can only be 3/4 full. You don’t want to kill them – just a little ‘humblization’.

On the bright side on my last review I am down 2.2 pounds or as I like to view it, a whole kilogram from last time. I’m a couple of centimeters toward being svelte and … and …! I guess at 58 there is no ‘and’. Doesn’t matter. It’s progress, & I’m making progress in my diet as well – except for fried chicken. I absolutely cannot resist fried chicken. And I love home made macaroni & cheese. And spaghetti & meat sauce. Be right back – I have to eat.

Anyway, I like to keep life in perspective. Most of the folks at the gym are pretty ordinary people just trying to make themselves a little better. Then you get Joe Jock Strap who is all powerful & loves to show off how strong he is. But then I remember that I have an uncle who will be 80 this year. He has lived most of life in the bush, as a park warden, trapper and general outdoorsman. He isn’t built like Arnie, but he is powerful, like farm life powerful or bushman powerful. Even at 79 I would not want to ‘test’ him. I can guarantee you that he, actually both he and my auntie, can outhike damn near any young person out there. I have always felt that they should invite the pair of them to be contestants on the Mantracker show. They would make it through the course, pluck the prize at the end & be back at the start without the Mantracker even knowing they’d left the starting gate. Either one could probably swipe Mantracker’s horse out from under him while he is glassing the horizons and he’d been none the wiser, for a few minutes anyway. That’s the kind of healthy I would like to be. Hells’ Belles’ it’s the kind of healthy we should all be, but I’m about forty years too late. But it is our way – I’m workin’ with what God gave me, and along with Rich, Cheyenne The Terminator and the rest of the crew down at the gym, I will get as close as I can. Have a great weekend all.

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